We Take The

The BULL Stops Here!

How To Grab Your Bully By The Horns

Written By Bryan Lee 09/20/2018

Going to practice or work every day can seem like a chore if you are being bullied. Bullying is an increasing problem that not only needs to be addressed, but conquered. However, before you can begin to "grab that bully by the horns", you must first be able to identify who the bully is, and what behavior they are engaing in that is making you feel hurt, scared, sick, lonely, embarassed or sad.

Many times bullies are physical and try to show domination over you by punching, slapping, kicking or pushing. You should NEVER TRY TO JUSTIFY THEIR BEHAVIOR. The behavior needs to be addressed and stopped. By justifying it as "just a bad day" or "just a phase" only allows the bully to keep bullying you, and keeps you submissive to them.

Be wary though. Sometimes bully will spread rumors about you, make fun of you, ignore you on purpose, threaten you, or try to make you do something that you do not want to do. You should NEVER DO ANYTHING YOU DON'T WANT TO DO, in order to fit in or get the bully to stop harassing you. By giving in, the bully knows he or she now has control over you and will continue to push the envelope to get you to do even more things that you do not want to do.

The two main things we want to immediately cover to help you today is (1) How To Avoid The Bully and (2) What To Do If You Are Forced To A Face-To-Face Confrontation.


(1) Do not give the bully the chance to pounce. If you can work at different times than the bully, change your schedule. If the bully targets you at lunch, go to break at a different time if possible.

(2) Stand Up and Don't Back Down. When you are afraid of another person, or feel somewhat inferior to them, it probably seems impossible to stand your ground because you are not feeling very brave. Being strong does not mean that you are not afraid, it just means that you sometimes have to DO IT AFRAID!

Find someone that you think is brave, or who is able to stand up to anyone, and watch them. How do they stand? How do they walk? What do they say when they talk? If you have to "practice" being strong at home, then do it, so that when you encounter your bully, you will be able to implement it.

(3) Be Strong To Feel Strong! One of the best ways that you can be strong in the face of fear, is to feel strong. Work out, lift weights, run, or do whatever it is that makes you "feel strong". Perhaps it's taking self defense classes, karate, Zumba, whatever....just do things that make you feel better about yourself, and things that make you feel ready to conquer the world!

(4) Travel in packs! If you can find a buddy at work or on your team, hang out with him or her. If you don't have one, and happen to see another loner who is being bullied, offer to be a friend or buddy. There is strength in numbers, and bullies are less likely to attack a group.

(1) SPEAK OUT. If a bully approaches you and verbally or physically attacks you stand up for yourself and speak out. Audibly alert everyone around you by shouting "No! Back Off!" DO NOT GIVE ANY OF YOUR AUTHORITY AWAY. Tell the bully they have no authority over you and that their behavior is not appropriate.

(2) DO NOT BECOME A BULLY. A natural reaction when someone attacks you physically and verbally is to attack back. DO NOT CALL THE BULLY NAMES. And do not engage in a physical altercation with the bully, unless you are defending yourself.

(3) STAY CALM. Do not show the bully that you are upset. Chances are, you ARE going to be upset, but bullies thrive on knowing that they are able to get you angry. Stay calm, stand your ground, and speak your mind, but do it calmly!

(4) REPORT IT! If someone is bullying you at work, tell a supervisor or take it to your Human Services Department. If you are on a sports team, report the bullying to your coach. If it's your coach who is doing the bullying, report it to his superiors. If it's a parent, report it to a teacher or school counselor. Typically, once a bully is found out by a superior their behavior slows down and eventually stops.

(5) RECORD IT! If at all possible, catch the bully's behavior on video. Whether it's recorded on a cell phone, body cam, or some other device, it's very difficult for a bully to deny what is on video. Keep in mind, DO NOT PUT YOURSELF IN HARM'S WAY JUST TO CAPTURE A VIDEO! If you cannot safely capture it, please don't attempt it. If you happen to see anyone around you filming it, ask them for a copy of the video.

Disclaimer: This information is for educational purposes only. It is not intended to diagnose specific medical conditions or offer treatments. The tips listed here have worked for the author, but other individual results may vary. 100% Bully-Proof and/or Bryan Lee are not responsible for any misuse of this information.